You walked into class after I started presenting with that smirk and I had to no choice but to grin. I felt revived even after my parched throat (the ventilation systems are horrible in class!) was closing in on me. I watched you plunk yourself down and grin at me in that mocking way and I had faith in what I was presenting on. I stumbled over my words, but in the excitement of getting over and done with the presentation, not because I was so affected by your presence, because it gave me courage. I knew you kept an eye on me and that was sufficient for me to know that no matter how nonchalant you seem, you still listen. I knew you were gonna back off and give me that usual look when I needed answers to my questions but actually seeing that panicked 'no-way' look, was enough to crack me up again. I wonder what F is wondering about since I kept grinning in your direction.
I just HAD to tease you about turning up for class and it ended up being boring. It does seem so! And your eagerness to suggest you don't come for class- yeah right. It was so much more fun with your snide comments about E and our burst of giggles. I've missed having you in class muchly, boy.
You waited for me after class without even asking if I was gonna be your company for our train rides back. Thank you. You snuck food (no-no) but offered (haha!) to get some for me.. and even threatened and scared the rest of them who were sneaking food too! HA! You mentioned being too early for training, thinking I didn't hear, but I hear everything about you. Thanks for not grumbling when I had to make a trip down to V's office. I deal with most of your stuff that concerns her so you don't have to, even if I don't have to.
Off we go, with people glancing. Sometimes I wish I could just shout it to the world or even a silent gesture of holding hands but I've realised it's not meant to be (yet?) I know you better than you think I do, and not in those sneaky ways I catch you off-guard about something I know that you didn't/wouldn't have suspected I'd have known. My heart aches when I see you glance at us (the classmates you hardly communicate with) talking and laughing in a bunch while you hang back, unincluded. I refuse to break ranks with you so you won't be alone, I'm like that cos it's unconditional. My friends know what you don't.
Our train rides back have given me greater insight into each other's lives and for that I'm thankful for His ways. Mysterious as they are, do they work best for you and me? We have morning tutorials from next week, you'll prolly go home. Does that mean an end to our train rides together?
Yesterday's' blisters weren't as painful because I got them while walking with you. The 40 minute walk back home after that was nothing cos I had you to think about. I love the way you tell me to walk further on in the train if it's a carriage that only one of us will have a seat, your expression when we walked upon the couple "dripping water into his eyes", the way you hurry me to get a seat on the train and the way your legs flap out so comfortably when you sit next to me, the way your eyes crinkle when you tease me (mercilessly) or the blush that creeps up your neck when you say something I tease you with and the way I talk to you about anything (well, except my love for you) and your answers are what I had in mind, you mind-reader. I love that all we need is a glance, a shared expression, a grin, a laugh and we know exactly the other is thinking, without words. I love you. Unconditionally.