I also believe you can so fast and hard for someone that you won't know what hit you. And herein lies the heartache. I know what it's like to fall for someone... at first sight. It didn't help that we hit off instantly. I learnt from that lesson. I've protected my heart so much since then that for a while I thought I also banished the thoughts and processes of loving and falling in love.
I went home, and it started happening all over again. Just that this time, I had the best of friends and an environment that allowed me more freedom than if I were here. It's working out although I don't think he's the one... for starters, he's on a different continent. He heads back to Oz, but not as frequently and I know in my heart that he will always go back to where he belongs, and that's not in Australia.
Back here, what had happened sometime in two trimesters ago started coming back to haunt me. One person I though I could forget about and put behind ends up right in front of my eyes, to tease and to tempt and to start up an inner turmoil I struggled so hard to keep. The facade is playing on still, but I reckon he's found out, to some extent. I'm not sure about him. He send weird signals. I cried in public once cos of him, I have no intention of doing it all over again.
I'm afraid that I'll forget to love and let love in... and it's dangerous for a person like me. I'm filled with so much love to give yet it's being subdued for the lack of a taker. I'll wait, but for how long I decline to mention... I don't know, prolly never will. Then again, never is a permanent word.