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Wednesday, 12 November 2008 1:56 am
alone.

No matter what I do, what I tell myself, what I think, it always ends up being incomplete. I just can't seem to get what I want, and when it seems so close to completion, it slips out of my hands and out of my control -- yet again. Its slowly devastating me, on the inside. On the outside, my eyes may say it all, but it belays the true fear. I keep falling for the right people at the wrong time, at the wrong circumstance and the wrong point in my life.

I know there's no fun in living an overly-organised life but why can't there just be a constant someone in my life? Its not the pressure from seeing more couples spring up around me but its just a heartfelt wrench in the heart when you turn next to you and see family and friends instead of a significant other. I'm not ranting, just contemplating. I've stopped pushing men away to protect my heart. Its stronger now. I just need the right guy to step in. Step in fast cos I'm falling.
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